did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
