She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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