Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
