I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
