So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
