dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
