I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Acid is not a monday night drug
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
