break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
