They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
