I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
The power of my boobs compel you
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
