I look better un-naked...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
