..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You can't special order awesome
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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