They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
