Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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