So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
