so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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