Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
