he was CRYING into my vagina
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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