I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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