I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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