I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
