I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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