Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
My pussy is not your playground.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
