This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
