Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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