So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize