I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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