Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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