My hand turned me down
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
