Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
