He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
