I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
