I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
