ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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