u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
