Say something about gay babies.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
