called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
