I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I don't deserve a penis
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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