just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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