Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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