i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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