Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
