No awkward lesbian experiences without me
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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