So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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