tell your sister to shave her snatch
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
