In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
