Me too!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
