I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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