what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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