What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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